Revive Your Relationship
With hectic schedules and daily work/life responsibilities, couples often find themselves not having as much time as they would like to focus on their relationship. Over time, partners can slowly drift apart and may loose sight of previously shared goals, dreams, and aspirations. Keeping your relationship a priority can be especially tricky during times of stress or major life transitions such as having a child or taking care of an elderly parent. It may feel like your relationship changed overnight, but most often it takes days, weeks, and years to become disconnected from one another. Relationships aren’t easy. Every relationship goes through ups and downs throughout the course of life. However, when a couple stops working on their relationship, the relationship stops working! Lasting, healthy relationships take hard work and commitment from both partners.
Due to the intertwined and recursive nature of relationships, when one partner struggles with something such as depression, anxiety, grief/loss, trauma, work related stress, or professional burnout, it undeniably effects their partner. If a person’s relationship with themselves, others, and/or their profession isn’t in a good place, it will eventually effect their quality of life and their relationships. In order to experience connectivity and intimacy with your partner, you also need to have a healthy and harmonious relationship with yourself.
Couples seek therapeutic support for many different reasons. The length of couples therapy depends on the context and severity of the presenting problems as well as the couple’s strengths and resources. Although some couples wait until they are in crisis or “on the brink”, couples can benefit from the therapeutic process at any stage in their relationship. I have worked with couples of all ages as well as diverse cultural, familial, and religious backgrounds. I have vast experience working with gay, lesbian, bi-sexual, and heterosexual relationships. In my practice, the most common presenting problems include, but are not limited to:
- Trust Issues or Betrayal
- Intimacy Challenges
- Conflict Management
- Infidelity and Recovery
- Traumatic Events
- Sex Related Issues
- Life Changing Transitions
- Separation or Divorce
- Parenting or Co-Parenting
Couples often seek therapy for problems related to mistrust, betrayal, or physical/emotional infidelity. Once trust is broken in a relationship, it is difficult to repair, but not impossible. When couples are in tune with one another and follow through with their commitments, trust can be rebuilt over time. Trust is an action, not a state of mind.
Couples also face challenges from work related stress, complex in-law relationships, parenting issues, pre-marital counseling, infertility or reproductive challenges, and some may even question whether they have fallen out of love with one another. Whether you or your partner feel unhappy in the relationship or unsure about the level of commitment to the relationship, couples therapy can help you reveal and interrupt the repetitive patterns that keep you stuck. Though therapeutic conversations, we are able to identify unresolved or underlying issues that contribute to the problem maintaining system. Utilizing a relational approach enables me to collaborate with each couple to co-construct customized solutions to meet their needs.
Effective communication and conflict management are key for any happy and healthy couples. As a couples therapist, I support each partner in refining their own style of communication. Couples therapy helps partners to listen and respond more effectively within every day life as well as during times of difficulty. Conflict is natural and healthy for relationships as long as it is managed effectively. My role is to facilitate a safe and balanced dialogue between partners to illuminate various strengths, resources, past successes, and solutions.
I help couples facilitate positive changes though using brief and effective strategies. Because we can’t change the past, I tend to focus more on helping couples create the changes they desire in the present while nurturing hopes for their future. Couples therapy can enable partners to experience more enjoyment, connectivity, and satisfaction in their relationship again. In order to sustain a lasting, intimate connection with one another, couples must prioritize their relationship; feel a fondness and admiration for one another; effectively manage conflict; continuously nurture their friendship; and make positive memories together.
In situations where couples aren’t able to forgive certain betrayals, find mutual respect for one another, or reconnect on their life paths, I also support them in the difficult process of bringing their relationship to an end.
Gottman Method Couples Therapy:
Working with couples is my passion! Amongst other theoretical models, I utilize interventions from the Gottman Method Couples Therapy. Dr. John Gottman is known for completing ground breaking research for over three decades focused on marriage, relationships, and parenting. The Gottman Method aims to help couples break through barriers to achieve greater connection, understanding, and intimacy. I completed Level 3 in Gottman Method Couples Therapy and intend to begin the extensive certification process in the summer of 2014.
Couples Therapy Success Stories:
“I felt welcomed, understood, and valued. It was as if our relationship mattered as much to Dr. Kate as it did to us. It was an enlightening experience and very applicable to our future thoughts and actions. What I found most helpful about the sessions was that my partner and I did not need to have problems in our relationship to benefit from the sessions. In fact, coming in with an already healthy relationship just confirmed, solidified, and enhanced our friendship and brought us to a greater level” -Pre-Marital Counseling
“As someone who has never been to a therapist- let alone with my husband- we were uneasy about it, but Dr. Kate made us feel comfortable and provided an environment that we could start opening up to each other. We saw a huge difference in our marriage right away! Dr. Kate helped provide an open forum for my husband and I to talk about things that had been building up between us so it was helpful that she was able to mediate for us.” -Brief Couples Counseling
“Dr. Kate was the best therapist I’ve ever had. She was professional, compassionate, and caring. She helped me to resolve my core issues and I learned to process them without getting stuck in them. For the first time in many years, I no longer struggle with depression. Her solution-oriented approach really worked for me and it helped me to save my marriage.” –Relationship Rescue
“My experience working with Dr. Kate was a really a life saver for me. I definitely was at a breaking point and she helped me process my thoughts, my past and how to move forward with my future. It was so helpful to have someone listen, provide empathy and know that the information shared was confidential. She was so welcoming and provided wonderful tools that helped me process thoughts and situations. I found so much comfort seeking therapy in an office that was pleasant and inviting. I always felt a weight lifted when leaving. I feel so blessed to have found Dr. Kate in a crucial time in our marriage. Thank you for all of your assistance to me, my husband and our relationship.” –Revived Relationship